The Brit Awards (the UK’s Grammys) were held last night in London, and the big winner was Lady Gaga. Not because she won 3 awards, but because she was able to flash her brand new vagina to the world.
Lady Gaga showing her vagina in England last night is ironic because just a few months ago Gaga showed her penis to a crowd at an English music festival. Obviously now that Lady Gaga has had that pesky wee-wee of her’s removed she is excited and ready to show off her new mangled vagina to anyone who can stomach looking at it.
To me it looks like a chewed up ham sandwich, but that is not bad at all for a post op snatch… or so I’ve heard.
A mandatory evacuation order is now in effect for anything living in the vicinity of Kendra Wilkinson vagina, officials announced on Wednesday.
The order, which was given due to the impending birth of Kendra’s child, is expected to affect more than 50 billion viral and bacterial residents of the vagina and countless other parasitic insects in the surrounding area.
“Anything that stays in that vagina is dead,” said a federal health official who wished to remain nameless. “When that baby hits, the whole area is going to be torn to smithereens.”
Previously, Kendra’s vagina was considered one of America’s pristine wetlands. But years of drilling and overuse have left it in shambles. It is feared that this birth may damage the vagina beyond repair, rendering the entire area worthless.
Jamie-Lynn Sigler is probably best known for her role as “Meadow” on the HBO series “The Sopranos”. That is until you just saw her pantyless upskirt picture above. Now she is best known for her having her vagina smile at you in a picture.
If a girl is going to go out with a dress and no panties she should at least have the decency to not shave her bush for a few months. Flaunting a shaved pubic region is an affront to Allah!
Jennifer Hudson
Singer and actress Jennifer Hudson has ruined her vagina by giving birth to her first child, her publicist has announced.
While Hudson is distracted by the arrival of the “beautiful and perfect baby boy,” fiancé, David Otunga, was said to be “grief-stricken” about the destruction of his mate’s previously-tight va-jay-jay.
“You always think of this as something that happens to some other woman’s vagina,” said Otunga as he placed a stuffed animal at a makeshift memorial beside Hudson’s mangled labia. “You never think about your own woman’s vagina being stretched beyond all comprehension.”
Added Otunga, “And now I can’t even look at roast beef sandwiches anymore, which really sucks because I liked those as well.”
A memorial service for Hudson’s vagina will be held on Friday.
