Actor and probably homosexual Tom Cruise set a world record yesterday by inserting the Burj Khalifa tower in Dubai into his rectum. As you can see in the photo above Tom Cruise smiles happily as he uses the world’s largest tower as his personal sex toy.
Of course this is an blatant attack by Tom Cruise against the Muslim people. Not only is Dubai an Islamic city, but the Burj Khalifa tower was modeled after us Muslim’s enormous manhoods.
By inserting our penis tower into his ass like this Tom is sexually harassing every Muslim man. Rest assured he will pay for his crime or my name isn’t Durka Durka Mohammed!
As you can see in the picture above actress Katie Holmes is chocking back tears of pride after she gave her daughter Suri some penis gummy candies.
The first time a daughter takes a penis into her mouth is a big deal in the heathen Western culture, so it is understandable that Katie is so overcome by emotion at Suri reaching the milestone at such a young age.
Looking at this pic you can almost hear Suri thinking while looking at the candy penises she is about to devour that, “I’m going to be just like daddy!” Truly a touching scene and one which provides fascinating insight into the sick culture of the immoral kuffars. Allahu Akbar!
CelebJihad.com has confirmed that Katie Holmes has rejected the wicked paganism of her husband and converted to Islam. Katie, seen here sporting her fashionable new Hijab, was attending a screening at the Sundance Film Festival just after leaving her nightly prayers.
Now, normally I would stone to death any woman who dares to show her face. Despite what moderate Muslims say, the Hijab is an abomination that is only fit for homosexuals and transvestites. A true Muslim woman would never leave the house without a Burqa. In fact, a true woman of faith would never leave the house at all because she would be too busy preparing her husband’s hookah and flogging herself for the sin of menstruation. But considering this is Zionist controlled Hollywood, I will take what I can get. Baby steps.
What if instead of being the immoral, soul sucking, blasphemers that they are, celebrities became their names? Of course it would never happen because celebrities despise a humble pious life dedicated to the glory of Allah. Instead they wish to mock Allah and portray themselves as Gods.
However, thanks to the witchcraft of Photoshop we can envision a world were celebrities are not lauded as superiors, but rather humbled as productive members of society. Here is what it would look like if celebrities became their names.
Al Gore
Carrie Fisher
Dane Cook
David Letterman
Gary Coleman
George Foreman
Heath Ledger
Jude Law
Keira Knightley
Kelsey Grammer
Kevin Bacon
Kevin Spacey
Lance Armstrong
Larry King
Madonna
Minnie Driver
Natalie Portman
Nick Cage
Orlando Bloom
Penelope Cruz
Sigourney Weaver
Tom Cruise
Tori Spelling
Wesley Snipes
Will Smith
Winona Ryder
