Celeb Jihad - The Only Celebrity Gossip Site Run by Islamic Extremists » Sister

Vanessa Hudgens’ 16-Year-Old Sis Stella Shows Promise

Durka Durka — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 19:23:59 +0000

Disney star Vanessa Hudgens’ 16-year-old sister Stella shows a lot of promise demonstrating her flexibility in the photos below.

Being 16-years-old, Stella is at the age were her clan has to make some important decisions about her future. Clearly Stella Hudgens would do well as one of a pious Muslim man’s wives, for she appears to be agile like a cat, and that will pay big dividends in a marriage when her future husband decides he has had enough of her lip and tosses her around.

One can only hope that the Hudgens clan marries Stella off soon. There is little no doubt after these pics are seen throughout the Muslim world, Stella will fetch a fine price at market (my guess is 3 goats at least). However, at 16-years-old the hour is already getting late, and the risk of her being ruined by leaked naked photos like her sister Vanessa grows larger every day.

Matthew Broderick Caught Cheating With Wife’s Sister

Durka Durka — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 16:01:06 +0000

Actor Matthew Broderick was caught in the photo above sharing an intimate moment with his wife Sarah Jessica Parker’s sister, a mare named “Dustbuster”.

Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker have been married for 14 years and have 2 kids together. No word yet if this photo will spell the end to their marriage, but one can only assume that it will be tough for Sarah Jessica Parker to forgive this betrayal by her husband and sister. Especially considering Sarah has always been jealous of Dustbuster’s career after she famously finished 2nd to her at the West Virginia Breeders Cup.

Yes I am afraid that Matthew Broderick cheating on his wife with her sister will be the straw that breaks the horse’s back, and there marriage is now all but over.

Selena Gomez Reunited With Long Lost Twin Sister

Durka Durka — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 17:22:35 +0000

Selena Gomez has been reunited with her long lost twin sister Morteous Gomez, who she has not seen since she was an infant.

When Selena and Morteous’ parents, poor Peruvian banana farmers Jose and Maria Gomez, had the girls they were shocked when the village doctor told them that they were identical in every way except for one, one of the girls was pure evil.

The Gomezs quickly ascertained that Selena must be the evil one when they heard the child try to sing, and it sounded like Satan banging a goat. So they decided to sell Selena to the Disney corporation with the hope that she would end up being killed in one of their many child labor run coal mining operations. Unfortunately that never happened as Disney choose Selena to be the Latin face of the company to the ever expanding Hispanic illegal immigrant population in the US.

Now Morteous has come to America to reunite with her twin sister Selena Gomez after their parents were found hacked to bits and partially eaten in what the local police deemed a murder suicide. Sources close to Selena tell us she is thrilled to have her twin sister back in her life, and can not wait for them to move in together to her dream house out in the woods and start making up for lost time.

Sadly Selena’s cat Mr Muff Puff will not be moving with them as he was found decapitated in Selena’s bed shortly after Morteous arrived.

Ashlee Simpson-Wentz: Don’t Call My Fat Sister Fat

Jimmy Jihad — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 23:33:28 +0000

Ashlee Simpson-Wentz has lashed out at those who call her fat sister Jessica fat.

Speaking to Women’s Health magazine, Ashlee said, “It’s disgusting that people would say those things. My fat sister has an incredible body. I feel sorry for anyone who would judge her, because she’s one sexy fat lady.”

We here at CelebJihad would like to apologize to Ashley Simpson-Wentz for calling her fat sister fat. We would also like to apologize to Jessica Simpson for calling her stupid sister Ashley an annoying cancer on the colon that is the entertainment industry.