Selena Gomez hit up a wild pool party at the Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas over the weekend with a few of her more attractive friends.
As you can see, after pissing in the pool Selena Gomez and friends posed for a picture in their bikinis. The girls then proceeded to review the photo and took turns remarking how “terrible” and “fat” they look in it, so as to elicit assurances and compliments from the rest of the group.
After drinking for a while and watching her friend in the blue bikini get all the attention from the guys at the party, Selena finally struck up a conversation with the pool boy one Paco Ramirez (pictured below).
Selena and Paco hit it off instantly. In fact they had so much in common that they ended up talking for hours about all of Selena’s favorite topics including tacos, picking lettuce, deck construction, enchiladas, and the intricacies of selling oranges on a freeway exit ramp. Paco and Selena then made a hasty retreat to the hotel’s employee housing unit, and were not seen again until the next morning when Paco shared the photo below with his amigos.
Clearly Selena Gomez has committed the ultimate betrayal against her longtime boyfriend Justin Bieber, for Selena has violated Justin’s trust by going behind his back and having sex with a stranger without him present to watch and then suck the creampie out of her lady hole. Justin Bieber may never forgive Selena for this.
Nude cell phone photos of former Disney star Selena Gomez have reportedly just been leaked to the Web.
No doubt Selena Gomez will feign being shocked and embarrassed by the leaking of these private nude pictures, and she will try to claim that her cell phone was hacked so that no one will state the obvious that her PR team leaked these pictures for attention.
Regardless of how they got out, the fact remains that Selena Gomez’s nude cell phone pictures are now part of the public record, and people will begin to speculate on whether Selena took these racy pictures for Justin Bieber, Orlando Bloom, Cara Delevingne, Paco The Donkey, or one of her numerous other lovers… but the smart money is on Paco.
Selena Gomez thrashes her body around in a sports bra while (probably) tripping on drugs in the disturbing video above.
I don’t know if Selena Gomez sniffed too many cleaning products during her day job scrubbing toilets for rich “gringos” or if she is taking some fine Afghanistan grown opium, but she must be high in this video for no sober person can be this spastic and slutty at the same time.
Yes it is clear from the bra dancing video above that Selena Gomez has a problem, and not just her usual problem of her period being late. Yes unfortunately for Selena this problem can not be fixed with a wire hanger, as it is called addiction. The first step to overcoming addiction is for Selena to accept Allah into her heart. The next step is for her to wear the martyr vest into a synagogue. Let us hope Selena gets help soon!
This weekend Selena Gomez attended the memorial service for her dead homie Paco “Jumping Bean” Sanchez, who was tragically gunned down outside of a Del Taco in East Los Angeles in yet another senseless enchilada related killing.
As you can see in the photos below, Selena Gomez kept it as classy as she is capable of for the funeral wearing a low cut long sheer black dress and no bra.
Naturally after seeing all the “eses” at Paco’s funeral, Selena’s nipples were as hard as freshly baked taco shells. However, Selena appears to have been able to distract herself from her grieving carnal desires by stealing a car and then a tacky silver necklace. No doubt Paco would have been proud.
Selena Gomez looks like some sort of slutty Mexican superhero, as she was photographed leaving her bi-weekly appointment at the abortion clinc in a cape, short jean shorts, and black leather knee high hooker boots.
From Selena Gomez’s perspective this outfit must be extremely practical. For the short shorts provide for ease of movement while cleaning the floors, as well as quick access to her burrito hungry taco cave. While the knee high boots not only conveys that she likes to f*ck, but they also protects her knees when she is at work scrubbing toilets.
However, I’ve yet to determine what this stupid long flowing cape shirt is for. Perhaps it is the closest thing Selena could find to a poncho, or perhaps it funnels the water off her back while she is picking lettuce. Either way it must also serve some sort of purpose for Selena’s sexual escapades. With this much extra material, jizz rag certainly seems the most obvious answer.
Actresses Selena Gomez and Emma Watson appear to have renewed their torrid lesbian love affair, as they were photographed naked fondling each other while on a kitchen countertop (breaking numerous sanitation codes) in the picture above.
Of course this isn’t the first time that we have caught Selena and Emma about to engage in passionate lesboqueer love making, as the photo in this article came out nearly a year ago. However, since then Emma and Selena’s dyke out session must have stopped (probably because Selena Gomez let loose with one of her noxious taco farts while Emma was rimming her back hole) as we have not seen anything more from them until today.
Yes Selena Gomez and Emma Watson about to devour each others’ lady parts in this photo is certainly a disturbing sight. To think that Emma’s tonuge is about to swirl around in Selena’s mouth before it slowly makes its way down her body, teasing her nipples, sliding up her slit, and finally massaging her clit is making my tunic snake rigid with furious indignation. When will their debauchery end!