Christmas came early for Tiger Woods this year when actress Brittany Murphy died suddenly in her LA home. Tiger and his harem of skanks who had been dominating the headlines the last couple weeks were instantly wiped off the front page as Brittany chased the dragon one to many times.
Brittany Murphy’s death looks like a clear case of drug overdose. However, we here at Celeb Jihad aren’t ruling out foul play just yet. We have to ask ourselves who would benefit the most from Brittany’s demise. The answer is most certainly Tiger Woods.
I’m no Angela Lansbury but I think the authorities should be at least questioning Woods about his whereabouts when Brittany Murphy died. Maybe they can smack him around some too, and see what he confesses too. I just find this whole thing a little to convenient for Tiger.
Feel free to make wild speculations and accusations in the comment section. It may be the only way we are going to solve this case!
In preparation for his upcoming divorce Tiger Woods has sought the help of the medical community to justify his adulterous actions. CelebJihad has obtained an official diagnosis that found Woods is a victim of “restless 3rd leg syndrome,” a disease commonly found in men over 30 that frequently travel and engage in contact with cocktail waitresses.
The official syndrome is described as a sleep disorder characterized by 3rd leg discomfort during sleep, which can only be relieved by finding a warm pocket of strange and banging away at it. Victims of this disorder are known to be so affected that they will risk a billion dollar empire in exchange for a five-minute romp with a skanky restaurant hostess.
Woods is expected to use this diagnosis in divorce court to prove that he was not at fault in the destruction of his marriage and blame his wife, Elin, for not supporting him in his battle with the disease.
The 2 latest Tiger Woods adultery stories come from 2005. When a then newlywed Tiger (he was married on October 5, 2004) banged multiple women.
The first woman was lingerie model Jamie Jungers. Last night she talked to the Sun newspaper and admitted that during their 18-month affair, she and Tiger would have sex in his house, and even in the bed that he shared with his wife.
Jamie said they began their secret affair in June 2005, after Tiger introduced himself in a club at the exclusive Bellagio Hotel in Las Vegas.
Within hours he wooed Jamie back to his hotel room for sex.
It came just eight months after he wed Swede Elin Nordegren.
Weeks later, Tiger invited her to his family home near Newport Beach, California.
By this time, Jamie had strong feelings for the golfer – and seeing pictures around the house of him with Elin made her unhappy.
She said: “It was heartbreaking. I imagined how she would feel if she knew I was in her house.”
“Later I said to him, ‘I don’t know a whole lot about your marriage situation. I know it is very fresh. I know you just got married. I mean, is it going OK?’ He said, ‘Yes, it’s fine, she’s in Sweden with her family’.”
The next new Tiger Woods cheating story is also from 2005, and it comes from a forum posting on the golf website 4gea.com on August 31, 2005. It states,
Okay, let me preface this by saying that I have no proof of what I am about to say. Therefore I cannot guarantee the accuracy of these claims. I am simply going to relay a story that was told to me last night.
My buddy’s girlfriend told me that her best friend just had an affair with Tiger this past weekend in Las Vegas. She was in the VIP section of Light ( a very exclusive club inside the Bellagio) when one of Tiger’s bodyguards asked her to come meet Tiger. She went over and sat with him, had a few drinks, then left through the back door. Got in Tiger’s limo, and he took her back to his exclusive room behind the MGM Grand.
Now I do know this girl and she is very attractive but not quite on the same level as Elin :-) I do not like spreading rumors like this but I’m fascinated by this story for some reason. I would never think of Tiger as the cheating type, especially since he is still a newlywed. She is a nice, normal girl from what I can tell and this is a pretty outlandish story to make up out of the clear blue sky.
We’ll continue to keep you posted as more of Tiger’s whoring comes to light.
