What if instead of being the immoral, soul sucking, blasphemers that they are, celebrities became their names? Of course it would never happen because celebrities despise a humble pious life dedicated to the glory of Allah. Instead they wish to mock Allah and portray themselves as Gods.
However, thanks to the witchcraft of Photoshop we can envision a world were celebrities are not lauded as superiors, but rather humbled as productive members of society. Here is what it would look like if celebrities became their names.
Al Gore
Carrie Fisher
Dane Cook
David Letterman
Gary Coleman
George Foreman
Heath Ledger
Jude Law
Keira Knightley
Kelsey Grammer
Kevin Bacon
Kevin Spacey
Lance Armstrong
Larry King
Madonna
Minnie Driver
Natalie Portman
Nick Cage
Orlando Bloom
Penelope Cruz
Sigourney Weaver
Tom Cruise
Tori Spelling
Wesley Snipes
Will Smith
Winona Ryder
Here is a hot tip from Joey Del Vecchio Hoboken, NJAy how you guys doin? I was driving down the Jersey turnpike the other day and I stopped at one of those fuckin rest stops to use the little girls room, ayyy.
So I walk into the stall and who do I see floating in the bowl but Gary fuckin Coleman!
So I says
“Ay Gary how you doin?”
And that fuckin guy doesn’t even acknowledge me.
So I’m like
“Ay what am I fuckin invisible here? “
“You think you’re too much of a big shot to talk me? “
“With your fuckin fancy Hollywood toilet paper outfit there.”
No response. He just floated there acting like he didn’t hear me. I swear to fuckin God I almost lost it on that fuckin guy and charged the bowl.
Oh and PS he stunk like shit.
