Killers, staring Katherine Heigl and Ashton Kutcher, premieres June 4th, but you won’t be seeing many advanced reviews. That’s because the studio behind the film thought it was simply too awesome to be screened for critics in advance. In fact, some executives at Lionsgate felt the cinematic tour de force about a secret spy and his stupid girlfriend was so incredible that critics’ heads might explode from witnessing it.

Also, Twitter has made film critics irrelevant.

In today’s socially connected marketplace, we all have the ability to share feedback instantly around the world. In keeping with this spirit, Lionsgate and the filmmakers want to give the opportunity to moviegoing audiences and critics alike to see `Killers’ simultaneously, and share their thoughts in the medium of their choosing. We felt that this sense of immediacy could be a real asset in the marketing of `Killers.’

Yeah, I bet you did, Mr. Lionsgate PR guy. Kind of like when you convinced that fat girl you were banging in college that you’d both be better off if you kept your relationship a secret. (AP/Cinemablend)

Twilight: New Moon is finally here, and so are the reviews. With a 30% favorable rating on RottenTomatoes.com, the critics are saying things that would make a vampire blush. Here’s a look at what some of the top critics had to say about the highly anticipated sequel staring Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson.

	Peter Travers – This is pure garbage. I work for Rolling Stone, so I know garbage.
	Roger Ebert – If watching this movie again would cure my cancers, I’d take my chances with the cancers.
	Claudia Puig – This film is a festering bowl of dog snot. Fuck this fucking shit.
	James Berardinelli - Remember that story that was going around a few years back about how gay guys in New York were intentionally getting AIDS as a right of passage? Yeah, my cousin Leo started that rumor. Also, New Moon sucked.
	Michael Phillips – I liked this movie. Couple that with my beard, and there’s no way I should be allowed near a playground.
	Rex Reed – The acting was horrible, but that wolf boy made my dick move for the first time in 13 years!
	Larry King – What was wrong with the old moon?