Laurence Fishburne Should Have Bought His Daughter That Pony

Troubled over the impending release of his daughter Montana’s sex tape, Laurence Fishburne is expressing regret for not having purchased her a pony on her 11th birthday, CelebJihad has learned.

“If only I would have bought her the god damn horse, maybe she wouldn’t have done this,” a distraught Fishburne told a close friend. “At the time, how was I supposed to know it would lead to her sucking c*** on camera.

While we here at CelebJihad can certainly sympathize with Mr. Fishburne, we feel his sense of guilt is misplaced. If anything, he should regret not raising his daughter in the Islamic faith. Time and time again, we see “Christian” girls prostituting themselves in movies and on the Internet, while virtuous Islamic women stay at home, primping and trimming their beards as they obediently await orders from their husbands.

  • niggapleez

    fuck Islam, and your ugly ass women, thats why you guys put them in veils so you’ll actually be able to reproduce with them.

    • blah

      hell yah

      • Dar al-Harb

        Islamic women are the best looking in the world! We cover them up because they are so hot we would rape them if we gazed upon them!

  • theheadchimp

    Serves the old man right, now maybe she will do a pony in her next movie. It could be like Debbie does Dallas only called Montana does Seattle Slew.

  • cosmicslop

    She is just a nasty attention seeker with Daddy issues, I really hope her porn career fails. pathetic really.

  • stevesblues

    …while virtuous Islamic women stay at home… being publicly flogged and then shot three times in the head because they are widowed, pregnant and because they live in Afghanistan. Hilarious. Illegal war my enormous floppy arse.


    better than hannah montana