Dead Michael Jackson Jokes

michael jackson



I do not know what would be more appropriate right now then jokes about Michael Jackson dying. If you have any to add do so in the comments section.

 

  • Michael Jackson hasn’t been this stiff since Macully Culkin spent the night at Neverland Ranch.
  • Because Jackson’s body was 95% plastic, he will be melted down and turned into legos, this way kids can play with him for a change.
  • Reports that Michael Jackson has died of a heart attack in his home are untrue… He actually died having a stroke in the children’s ward.
  • In the spirit of recycling, Michael Jackson will be melted down into plastic party cups so kids can still get their lips around his rim.
  • In accordance with Michael Jackson’s will, little boys’ pants shall be flown at half-mast today.
  • Doctors are looking into claims that MJ’s death could have been caused by an allergic reaction from eating 12 year old nuts.
  • I heard Michael Jackson died of food poisoning from eating a 5 year old wiener.
  • Micheal jackson will always be with us… he is not biodegradable.
  • Farrah Fawcett arrived at the Pearly Gates and God asked her what he could do for her having led such an honest life. Farrah asked God to simply make sure the children of the world were safe. Five minutes later, Michael Jackson died.
  • MJ’s dying wish was to be melted down and turned into straws so he can still get sucked on by kids.
  • It has been released that MJs last wish was that he wants to be melted down and made into a slide so kids can go down on him forever.
  • In memory of MJ’s death, McDonald’s is coming out with the new “McJackson”. It’s 50 year old meat between 12 year old buns.
  • Michael Jackson’s ashes are going to be put in an Etch A Sketch so kids can still twiddle his knob.
  • Michael Jackson’s death has now been ruled a suicide. Apparently doctors told him that the only way he could get whiter is if he died.
  • Only in America can someone be born a poor black kid, and die a rich white woman.
  • Madonna sent her condolences to the Jackson family. Then asked how much they wanted for the kids.
  • Breaking News: Casper the friendly ghost was molested in the early hours of this morning!
  • Michael Jackson’s last words: “Take me to the Children’s Hospital!”
  • What was Michael Jacksons last hit? The floor!
  • Michael Jackson died of a heart attack. He really shouldn’t have looked at the man in the mirror.

 

  • Cha

    you people are heartless ass bastards. Watch out for Karma

    • sherry

      i agree wi ya cha

      • gay

        there only jokesss,
        chill out you tit

        • Cha

          how bout’ you go suck one ass wipe

          • bouyed

            only 1 asswipe? was it used on Macully Culkin ? will it fit through the new straws they’ll make when the melt him?

          • Neya

            Jackson jokes are even better than jade goody jokes!

          • kool

            cha chill out he was a pedo chirst u almost as bad worshipping a pedo i wont lie to u it was a shame bout his death……… cardiac arrest is abit quck for a pedoXD

          • myxlplik23

            Hes guilty or he wouldnt have paid 22 million to shut the family up…I hope he burns in hell!!

          • bubba

            this is some funny stuff… he was a child molester.

          • mjsdeadyay

            F-U-N-N-Y

        • Sean

          Tit. Good one. Even Sherry can spell that, and probably understand it.

        • Mrs.jackson

          You are a heartless, evil, disgrace to any human on this earth. You should be ashamed of your self. If Michael were here he probably would cry and I would be there for him. Ppl like u is why some ppl commit suicide. I love Michael and mostly every one with common sense in this world should. It’s idiots like you that comment and say heartless stuff about ppl. You have feelings and I know u wouldn’t want your feelings to be hurt. But I know he’s in a better place than here with you evil ppl. And when it’s my time to go imma be in heaven with him. R.I.P. Michael I love you with all my heart… I just wish you were here to read this and I wish you knew how much I loved u.

      • drea

        hey RETARD!
        Learn to spell… because I’m pretty sure that you meant with ya…

        wtf is wi ya cha? are you asian

        • drea

          and that was meant for stupid sherry :) LOL!!!!!

        • jimmyd

          if you look at the first post… the persons name is cha…. maybe you should learn how to read…

        • Eunice

          Racist much?

          • Devi tex

            shut up u noisy gong!

        • Sean

          I didn’t EVEN want to point that out. Karma might just coem uup an byte mee n the ahaz. Soe awl ewe peepal shud whach out 4 KARMAh.

      • siani

        I AGREE

      • Sean

        Hey CHA. He admitted and paid off HOW many parents when he fucked their little boys? You’re right Karma should be watched out for. See fucking little boys and paying off the parents gets you DEAD at 50.

      • Sean

        AGAIN. (pronounced=uhh-g-in) Sherry?, are you syaing u agrey wi KARMA or molestation of little boys? I mean, it’s acceptable when your rich enough to pay off the parents? Is that what you mean? Or…wait,,,is somebody you know a catholic priest, or a Boy Scout Troop Leader, or a convicted…..oh……….I’m sorry but I think maybe GOD took care of that problem. Maybe Cha and yourself might want to watch out for GOD. MJ should have!

    • Big Daddy

      Michael Jackson’s official autopsy determined that he didn’t die from a heart attack, he choked on a small bone

      • jjboo

        you ass hole

        • PhukFace

          Get over is jjboo, what an asshole you are.

        • Sean

          I think THAT was MJ’s pet name for all his little white boys. NO that was the pet name for the Asian one…….. Think about it, say it out loud with an accent…….

      • Mash

        lol nice one! heres another:

        Farrah Fawcett lay in her death bed, giving the hospitals faculty her final words. “I wish for all the children of the world to be safe.” 6 hours later, Michael Jackson was dead

        • Devi tex

          but the fools ov the world will neva appreciate kind guys like mj

      • yur mom

        he didnt choke on a bone stupid ass

    • bouyed

      well–Michael is heartless after the autopsy, so why should WE be as well?

    • bouyed

      Karma karma kaarma kamilleon <<–wasn’t that Boy George? is he dead too?

      • ToXiC

        I think Boy George is in jail for holding a male escort hostage tied to a bed!

      • cwh51

        THAT was funny!!!! now I have to clean the coffee spew off my computer screen

      • triqua.

        ha ha.I love that song, and I love Micheal Jackson. But the some of the jokes are funny.And I feel sorry Billy Mayes died too that friday:’(

      • hater36

        I sure as hell hope so……he should have died a horribly painful death along with all the other pedifiles in the world…….everytime I hear about MJ on the TV I want to puke……too bad he didn’t die before he abused so many children!!!!

        • Angel

          go stick your dick in a hole, preferably your daddy’s

          • 123

            Hope you´ll never have children.

        • Mjlover09

          you mother fuckin ass hole how would u if u like it if u died tonight and we made fun of your ass i hope that happens u ass HOLE!!!!! -PeaceLove&MichaelJackson

          • 123

            He´s dead. So he would not … whatever. Anybody who´s dead WOULD NOT, that´s nature.

    • bouyed

      This Just In–Casper the Friendly Ghost —Molested

      • jjboo

        shut up

    • cowboy

      Karma? Bwahahahaha. Seriously?

    • hooha

      he got what he deserved after all this time not so bad really

    • Truth about Karma

      You obviously don’t know what Karma is if you are using it as a threat against people who can laugh at these jokes…

    • hobo82

      Hows that heartless, that man was a homosexual pedophile. So piss off, the world is a better place without him. Good riddance to bad medicine.

      • jjboo

        shut the fuck up if it was not 4 him most places would be made of racists and more people like you so you piss off and get a life instead of labeling someone elses ohh and 1 more thing MTV would have not be showing black people,s if it was not for him so go suck some dick you ass hold (scum of life) and that is coming from the heart

        • PhukFace

          You liberal bass turd, get the fuck over it.

        • PhukFace

          i’ve come to a decision, your like a real asshole, all you are good for is expounding SHIT.

          • lee

            LISTEN ALL U DICK SUCKING DOUCHEBAGS U NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP ASSHOLES NO HE DIDNT CHOKE ON A BONE UR MOM DID AFTER TRING TO SUCK UR DICK AND HE WAS FOUND NOT GUILTY AND I LOVE HIM AND YES I AM A GIRL AND WAS NEVER AT NEVERLAND RANCH BUT IM SURE IF I WAS THERE THERE WOULD B NO THINGS GOING ON BTW THEM U ASSHOLES U ARE SO DISRESPECTFUL TO THE DEAD BY CONTUIEING THESE DUMBASS JOKES
            R.I.P. MJ I LOVE YOU

        • the truth is

          um you do realise there are other black musicians before MJ names like Jimi Hendrix come to mind

          • Rick Jamesbitch

            Jiboo you are a dumb fuck wad.They served caviar at his funeral because it came on little white crackers.Yum Yum!!!!!!!!!!!!!

        • jiboos dumb

          you realize how fucking stupid you are jiboo? get off the fucking computer your name pops up under like 50 different comments jackass and your a fuckin moron if you really believe that black bullshit. the black people disowned him when he became white now all of the sudden he was so revolutionary for black people you fucking idiot. nobody gave a shit that he was black you fuckin idiot black people have been singing way before him. i hate dumb whiney little bitches like you that try and make a race issue out of fucking everything shut the fuck up god and go suck some dick you ass hold (scum of life) and this is coming from the fucking heart

        • onewithaduck

          How exactly is this world less racist because of michael? I believe that Malcolm X, and Martin Luther King and Harriot Tubbman were the ones who led the movements that turned racism around and lessened it. If anything, Michael made ppl hate african americans more, there is nothing worse than a pedophile after all.
          Im glad he died, good riddance. I hope he burns in hell. I just wish that he died a more slow and painful death. I was molested as a child, so I know what it does to a person mentally………. Fuck Michael Jackson!

          • jayla

            you need to shut up and stop hating and just for saying you wish mj can burn in hell i hope you do to and stop so much shit

        • jojack

          you think we should thank him for that
          are you fuckin retarded
          i mean sure he once was a black boy
          BUT DIED A WHITE WOMAN
          MOLESTED CHILDREN
          and if you find that hard to believe
          its your own fault
          the guy had a zoo theme park
          and neverland for fucks sake

          • Troy

            Man shut the fuck up bimbo he did not molester kids he was found innocent at his trial for the inncedent with kids so get your facts right and chew on a prick jojack

        • BLA!

          ………. Can someone say “who is” Martin Luther King, Jr.? Did he have anything to do with this? Or was it all just the pedophiles doing?

        • hater36

          waaaaaa…….waaaaaaaaaaaaa

        • WTF

          …. Black people didnt get their rights from Micheal Jackson…. did you go to school?

    • yoboi

      You say were heartless for making fun of a famous person who molested a child? and also went from being a young black man to an old white lady.

    • mike

      michael jackson is burning in HELL with the other molesters.your a pathetic FANatic

      • Jonesie

        M J opened his heart to millions of children. Problem is he opened his fly to some too …Bill Cunningham WLW radio.

        • jjboo

          you shut the fuck up too

        • dildo

          You guys should stop hatin. He loved so many children, especially thier pink little assholes.

    • El_Guapo_Diablo

      Don’t be such a damn hypocrite! The whole world was saying this stuff until that freak died!! He hasn’t done anything worth noting (musically) since the 80′s if that, and the guy was a narcissistic child molesting waste of skin! These jokes are gold and it’s nice to see the whole world isn’t based on hypocrisy. I say keep up the good work! And by the way Michael Jackson had karma kick his ass in a big way and personally I’m glad! It shows there might be a merciful god! Now if only we could get these psychotic wacko jacko fans to rid themselves of the world we might stand a chance at having a decent worthwhile society where people don’t worship sick bastards and use up precious resources that the rest of us deserve!!

      • fan

        your a fuck head just cos people like his music doesnt mean they would worry bout his private life no one will ever know except the children that alledged sexual abuse as far as his fans go he has really good music

        • Rick Jamesbitch

          He liked black eyed peas because they cum in little white cans like him.

      • jjboo

        go fuck your self and get a life you dont know if he didi it or not if so you need to be called stalker and wat do you mean waste of skin he helped millions of people so why dont u try that in your life time ohh im sorry you cant cuz all to are is dead to the real good people of our earth wher ein fact more people are molesting kidz and didi not get such a scorning so go FUCK YOUR SELF and i mean it

        • Jablome

          and i mean it <<– Not a Michael Jackson Joke –but still FUNNY as hell you fucking loser –go wipe your floor with your face

          • MJsdeadthankgod

            Hey jjboo, it goes to show that someone with your lower IQ (obvious based on your spelling and grammar) would defend such an individual as him. Many popular stars of Hollywood dont get accused of the things that he was accused of, and where theres smoke… theres fire.

          • bruce

            the jacksonfamily wants everything m.j owned so they made boy georgr lift up its dress and give back m.js glove

        • tastymonkey

          wow dude… realllyy so how do u know he didn’t do it? maby u were in neverland with him?? touch ur cock and now ur tryin to defend his ugly ass.

        • Rick Jamesbitch

          Sticking up for the child mollesters now ,Huh? jigaboo?or jiboo?whatever the fuck your name is>Whats next?Bring back Hitler?Why dont you sit back, relax,and calmly set yourself on fire with some kind of petroleum based fuel then tell me how your feeter peels.

        • hater36

          Michael Jackson was a worthless pedophile nigger and the world should have been rid of him a long,long,long time ago.The fact that he lived this long is an insult to every parent in America.I celebrated when I heard of his death,and I will continue to celebrate everyday that I hear his name on the TV or Radio.FUCK YOU michael jackson,and all who love him!!!!!

          • Angel

            Bitches like you are the reason “niggers” exsist. Perhaps your momma should have fucked a nigger, would have made you a better person with a reason to live. Having said that, go shoot yourself in the head bitch

          • the creator

            dude yur lame as fukk lol

    • torgy

      I wonder if the freak lovers would still defend the freak if it was their kids he molested

    • Tara

      Well… I don’t feel sorry for child molesters. But hey if that’s your thing…

    • pycso matthew

      no he just liked playing with kids he was a great singer but. his real job was pkaying with childen

    • turban_h8er

      your a fuckin paki, what about ur karma u rag top son of a bitch

      • BLA!

        I hate M.J. just as much as Mother Teresa but….. Paki? not cool guy, not cool. Buddhism is one of the 3 religions that Karma came from and that started in India, not Pakistan…………….. Not cool

    • Brian

      I may be a heartless ass bastard, but I’m good at it!

      • Dead Ed

        Wow, what a week it’s been. Ed McMahon, Farrah “Hottie”, Mick Jacko & leave up to Billy Mays to throw one in for free. The biggest coverage is the pedophile. Why? I dunno. The others led an honest, humble & classy lives. Of course, my favorite moment of MJ is how quickly (within hours) jokes came about on his death. I love them. It inspired me to post some on, too.

        That is the only… ONLY way MJ should be celebrated. I can’t believe a memorial service is gonna be held at the Staples arena. For a necro pedophile. A NECRO PEDOPHILE!! (Not necropedophile. Two words. Big difference.)

        Dudes, WTF is going on with my country? Why celebrate a pedophile & not someone who is more a hero than a pedophile? It’s Independence weekend, 4 cryin’ out loud. Why not celebrate the soldiers who sacrificed for us to say whatever the fuck we want instead of tarnishing our morals by allowing children to see we celebrated a pedophile? someone who looked at our children as sex objects. What will are children say long after we’re gone. That we never did enough to protect them? We didn’t lock up the molesters and throw away the key? That we celebrated everything the molesters ever did while alive and long after they were dead by treating them as icons, paragons of virtue, legends & role models?

        Who’s the sick bastard? The ones posting jokes on a well deserved pedophile, or the ones worshiping him?

        Who’s the sick bastard? The ones telling the jokes, or the one laughing at it?

        What happened to our morals?

        Who cares MJ died? Who would care if I died? Who would care if you died?

        GET A LIFE!! Stop celebrating celebrities.

        • Dead Ed

          DURKA DURKA! I’macelebjihad!
          Fuck celebrities!

          • jjboo

            fuck u its becuz you r not a celeb

    • michael

      100% right mate

    • BP

      Wow your sad if you thought that he was a great guy. (or gal)

    • Jake

      Karma?? WTF??? What are you some new age flower kissing moron? So what did little children do to get bad “karma” and end up being molested by Jacko?

      • Dead Ed

        Cha. Cha. Cha. You tried. You failed. Goodbye. You’re a loser. And take “Karma” wit’ cha.

        You’re the basis of Pseudointelectualism.

        Anybody else siding wit’ Cha: we’re right. You’re wrong. End of story.

        • Angel

          Ed. Ed. Ed. your jealous of Michael because you will never be half the man or success that he was…and that’s the end of story you loser…no you HATER!!!

          • Dead Ed

            Angel, you’re pathetic. Get off MJ’s dick already.

            You’re on the WRONG webste. The celebjihadist c thru your bs.

        • Angel

          not on mj’s nuts at all, but i am sure pathetic is the term used to describe ur nuts!!!

          • Dead Ed

            You need to find the “ctrl” button. You’re losing it.

            I’m on a blackbeery. There’s no “ctrl” & I don’t need it. I’m ALWAYS in control.

      • Rick Jamesbitch

        yeah he even mollested their dogma

    • godly

      you watch out for karma fool

      • Dead Ed

        Karma has caught up with Michael Jackass. I’m not the one who tucked kids in to bed & fed them hot milk with cookies. I didn’t put the fireplace on to read books to stranger’s kids. Parents are just as fault, I would never let my kids stay with a 25-50 year old man unsupervised. Or ANY age. Not even with my uncle. As a matter of fact, I wouldn’t trust Michael Jackson with my uncle.

      • Rick Jamesbitch

        Fool? and your handle is Godly? another stupid fucking hypocrite.Judge not lest ye be judged by the same measure.Fooooooool!! He He He He

    • fred

      u bastards u sould leaf him alome coke cause u coke

      • Jablome

        WHAT? language is that Fred? Leaf him alone? get a fucking GED already

      • trashie plastik

        yeah leaf him alone. I beleaf he has gone to heven and is feeling releafed!

    • booboy

      fucking take a joke you ugly ass!!!!

    • MINDFUCK

      MINDFUCK youll shit bricks

    • tom

      fuck you he was a dam coon

    • trashie plastik

      Jackson by name jackson by nature!

    • lance

      get fucked u nacker

      • Rick Jamesbitch

        It’s Nukka

    • tattooface

      Fag MJ was a fucking rapiest

    • D-bag

      Cha….your a fucking idiot loser.Sherry….your a retarded follower.
      Michael Jackson fucked kids,ALOT!. He was rich enough,perverted enough(i.e,who else does that to themselves,he was a plastic surgery addict and had the mind of a 10 year old girl),and had enough money to pay off the many parents that complained about why their children acted a little different after spending time with Ol’ MJ.
      Fuck all who are so blindly sympathetic that they can’t see an easy case of obviousness even after it slaps them in the face with it’s tiny white penis.Go kill yourselves you weak,pathetic sheep.

      • cha

        D-bag your name says a lot about you. Dick bag, Douche bag, Dumb bag…. I just wonder if u were in the room during all these “fuckng of little kids” that went on???? I have argued with enough idiots on this website, go eata dick, preferably your own

    • james

      miachel jackson WAS a sick twisted homo pedofile.The world will be a better place with him melted down

  • Greig

    Whats the difference between Sir Alex ferguson and micheal jackson? Sir Alex ferguson will still have giggs next year.

  • mimz

    this si fucking sick and insensative, i can’t believe how heartless some people are

    • ricky bobby

      learn how to type bud and who cares if were having some fun

      • IckyB

        it might be sick and twisted….but some of these jokes are still awesomely funny!!

        • tink_23

          no they are not…………………..no ones laughing at them but you and it kindda makes you look stupid dude now laugh.

          • trixxter

            i’m laughing ( my ass off)

          • matt

            im laughing to. totally funny.

            what did the man say at the beach to mj? please get out of my son. lmao

          • hahahaha

            HAHAHAHAHA.. i think these jokes are AMAZING!!!!!!! u look stupid for defending a child molester.. and he’s dead now so who cares if we have a little fun?!?!!

          • Nathan

            Hahaha your the only one NOT laughing and heres a good joke :

            Ferrah Fawcet died and went to heaven. God said “I’ll grant you one wish.” She said “I just wish for all the children to be safe.” Then Michael Jackson died.

          • Katie

            Uhm, my family and I laughed at every single one of them. Although we do agree that they are terrible to imagine, and very mean…. they are completely hilarious, because he was sick and twisted from his horrible childhood and a crazy life. He made fantastic music, but his music is a lot different than him as a person… we can make fun of him as a person. His music was admirable, but he was fucked.

          • cecollie

            It seems there are actually a lot of people laughing at them. If you don’t like the jokes…go somewhere else.

        • bee tea dub

          Michael Jackson’s heart finally realized that it was black…. so it decided to stop working!!!

      • loosingbraincells

        I’m getting dumber just reading these posts.

    • bouyed

      well–Mj is heartless after the autposy–so why can’t WE be ?

    • bouyed

      As quoted from Macully Culkin when he was 13–Michael, This whole thing really leaves a bad taste in my mouth

      • Twisted

        Funny you should mention Mcauley Caulkin. Word has it Michael hasn’t been this stiff since he spent the night

    • tink_23

      wow,i though he was dead.i and i still do.who plays like that anyway.people are so childish ya no.i love him i liked him since i was 5 and its not a good feelin to know that he died.one of my favorite songs were thriller(i no im random lol)R.I..P MICHAEL JACKSON…..I GIVE MY HEART TO THE JACKSON FAMILY

      • the ad man

        and he loved you when you were five..now youve grown older he slowly lost interest… =P

        • hockeyplayer4life53

          ha ha ha ha ha ha ha that is so funny, you know that if you play thriller backwards.., michael says all the kids he molested..thats why its 14 minutes long. :)

        • leeland0123

          hahahaha thats soo funny

    • joe

      michael started off as a motown kid and ended up like a plastic freak with a face that scares the shit out of evry1 but these jokes are funny though lol!

    • get-ova-it

      not half as SICK as WACKO-JACKO

    • STEVE

      I BET YOU READ ALL THE JOKES AND LIKED EM. IF NOT WHY ARE YOU ON THIS SITE.

    • yo papa

      Even though this is morally incorrect………..THIS SHIT IS FUCKING FUNNY!!!!!!!

    • bullant

      It could not have happened to a nicer bloke!

    • Luis Fernando

      Before i saw this website I thought it was absolutely incorrect to make fun of an individual after their death. These jokes are funny as hell. Congratulations to all of you who made this happen. I absolutely love it!!!!!!! Keep it coming.

    • theman

      well your lookin at the site to so your just as sick

    • just talkn

      dude get a life wer not hartless

  • Dino

    Michael Jackson died after tripping over a childs push chair…an inquest said it’s too early to “blame it on the buggy”

    • Big Daddy

      was he pushing in a child’s stool?

    • tink_23

      wow dude not funni…….

    • besnik terdevaj

      i cant belived that he drined drug [ plus he gay because he touch kids nut and he touch his nuts when he sing

  • someecards

    Michael Jackson’s death has inspired me to spend more quality time with your children. http://bit.ly/3bmLg

    • wiz

      hahaha thats just plain funny

    • asuwere

      I really thought MJ was a great performer one of the best. But these jokes are friggin Hillarious.

  • Michael Ianb Black’s Twitter Posts

    First morning without Michael Jackson. The world has lost a superstar but gained a ton of hair relaxer.

    When they do MJ’s autopsy, do you think they’ll find Tinkerbell inside?

    Upset about Michael Jackson. The 13 yr. old in me still loved him. The 37 yr. old me wanted to see him complete his transformation.

    https://twitter.com/michaelianblack

  • darren

    Jackson five reunion tickets now on sale 20 percent off.

    • Twisted

      ROFLMAO

    • ericau2000

      that was a good one

    • whatever

      OK that one was actually funny, made sense (unlike some of these) and not so didstasteful like most of these!
      :)

    • John

      Thats funny!! The guy was a joke in life and he still is one now. let the good times roll!

    • dazmataz

      that was just hilarious

  • moni

    fuck all you heartless son of a bitches.

    • Jon

      Well that was very heartless of you.

    • bouyed

      why are YOU LOOKING THEN STUPID BYATCH?

    • jamie gray

      fuck off stop sticking up 4 pedephile he had his chance to tell his side but he brings a young boy with him holding his hand he a jackass

      • ToXiC

        Damn Straight

        So I freakin’ LOVE this page && if you’re interested..
        I started a facebook group ~~ Come Join

        Michael Jackson is Dead && We’ll make Jokes if we WANT, So Shut the Fuck UP
        http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/group.php?gid=119951026390

        Jockeys at tomorrows race meeting will wear black armbands out of respect for Jacko who successfully rode more 3 year olds than anyone in living history

    • Lol

      Hahaha

    • Jacko Hater

      FUCK YOU, PAEDO LOVER!!!

    • google-foogle

      oh get over your self, nothing you say is gonna bring him back so just shut up and get the hell off this website. this is for people with intellect and for people who don’t fall in love with pedophiles (Edward Cullen included) oh and also, saying someone is heartless doesn’t do anything apart from a make an ass out of you

    • Rick Jamesbitch

      Ok.Bring your mom too Moni

  • GJM

    Tens of thousands of people die every day due to war & starvation and nobody gives a shit yet the world goes crazy over this plastic paedo….discuss.

    • Cha

      you are right. tens of thousands of people do die everyday, but do you people get on line and make all this retarded ass jokes. Who cares if you don’t like the man. he still has family that is greiving and hurting you bastards!!!

      • GJM

        Greiving relatives is one thing, mass hysteria by people who didn’t know him is another.

        • Cha

          so that makes your heartless oh so not funny jokes okay??? Is there 2 types of dead I don’t know about???

          • Carse

            Each time you get the idea that you can tell people what they can and cannot make jokes about, you are moving one step closer to being the thought police. If you don’t like the jokes, nobody is forcing you to read them or to laugh at them or to repeat them around the water cooler.

          • ericau2000

            I just hope when I die, people will take the time out to make jokes about me, not paedophile jokes though

      • bouyed

        ha cha cha cha love Jimmy durrante

      • shuhor

        if it botherso you so much why are you in here reading this? No disrespect to the family, I’m sure they have something more productive to do then look for dead jokes.
        .

        • tink_23

          samething im sayin this is REAL….i love him so much and i hope the familys okay but ya know everyone dies at some point and it will be something that will be with them till the day they die………….so stop with all the dead jokes people…………..no ones laughing at them…………i know im not so stop it

          • trixxter

            how exactly did you get to this website?
            I typed “michael jackson jokes” into google.
            if you don’t like it, why did you read all of them, let alone respond?

          • cecollie

            Again, no one’s laughing at them? Just because you aren’t doesn’t mean everyone feels the same way. Go away if you don’t like it.

          • trashie plastik

            they were some of the most funny jokes i ever read!

      • secret x

        You need to realise. He has made his bed. He is now lying in it.

        • bgunn2

          with several children of course

      • Cancer baby

        How many dead MJ babies does it take to paint a wall??

        Depends on how hard you throw them…

      • just talkn

        cha u the bastard ur the one who comes in here clearly seeing the sit it was ur choice the n u come down here and try to make us sound like the idiots

        • Angel

          u proved my point!!! swallow what ever crap you have in ur mouth, and I dare not ask what it is, then say it again. If that doesn’t help, then perhaps try pre K again. There is an open seat in my 4 yr olds class

          • devil

            hey angel… dont let michael hear about that empty seat. he could just pop down and sit there, then some poor defenseless child comes along, sits down, and well, you know the rest, we are talking about michael jackson after all. p.s. did i pass your little spelling test?

          • Angel

            what the fuck are you talking about??? Take the dick out your mouth and try it again cause you not making a bit of sense. P.S. You should learn to read and write before attempting a spelling test!!!

          • devil

            you know… you’re right. I never learned to read. And i do in fact have a dick in my mouth. You see the ghost of Michael jackson has come back from the depths of hell to molest my supple young body. In fact I’m the only person in the seventh grade who has acctually met Michael. By the way better be more careful who you call a dicksucker, because when i was a boy my uncle used to molest me. so thanks. P.S. who’s heartless now? You stupid bitch! And fuck your 4 year old too!

          • Dead Ed

            Hey, devil, my uncle molested me, too. I don’t need to know MJ personally to know he’s a guilty SOB. MJ was 16 yrs older than me. He’s been a public figure way before I was born, for about 7 yrs b4 I was born. So I was born into a MJ world & grew up knowing who he is through biographies & documentaries. For peeps to say someone doesn’t know MJ, they can’t be more wrong. He was thrown in my face my whole life since discovering him on my own. I didn’t search him out. He was ALWAYS talked about.

            Anyway, I saw his transformation. And I’m not talking about his physical transformation. My uncle wasn’t the only one. So I know the type MJ transformed into. And he wasn’t the innocent MJ they show on TV from the Jackson 5 days. His tranformation started sometime after “Thriller” came out IMO.

            You can pretty much draw your own conclusion on someone when you’ve known them a long time. You don’t need the media to tell you what to think. I can think for myself & be my own journalist through research & verification. Apparently others think the same way. Others… just want to idolize him & he can do no wrong in their eyes. They ignore the obvious clues & his (mental) transformation. They recognize his musical hits. That’s about it.

            If they would read the link I made, somewhere on this topic & other MJ topics on this site, about an interview with MJ, IN HIS OWN WORDS, I would like for them to tell me what “normal” person does what he did.

            FUCK seeing the interview on the internet. READ the interview. Word for word. THINK about what he is saying. You’ll be shocked. Horrified. Because NO “normal” person does what he did. And anybody who knows the type, knows what he REALLY did.

            Here’s the link again.

            http://niketalk.yuku.com/topic/187478/t/Michael-Jackson—affinity–children-Mature-Discussion.html

            MJ fans won’t like it. And lash out at regular people even more. But the real MJ needs to be discussed.

            For the record, I’m not asking you find him guilty of anything. Read the interview & draw your own conclusion. For once in your life, THINK FOR YOURSELF…

          • cha

            I am so glad to hear that you were molested Devil….hopefully when you die we can start a website about how much of a dick sucking of little boys loving, ass fucking of 5 years old boys you were. I will even post the first comment…better yet my 4 year old can, and hopefully you can read it loose booty bitch!!! go give your uncle a hug and a kiss from me, preferably his nuts!!!

          • devil

            oooh, sorry cha, i didnt happen to mention this but, i cant call my uncle. and i cant give him a hug or a kiss. do you know why??? because my uncle was michael jackson you stupid fucking bitch. so go ahead and post some jokes you cunt. i would love to know that even under a fake name, i could have so much of an impact on the world, that i could have people arguing about me after i die. so get started bitch. but i have a feeling that you aren’t funny in the least.

          • laughin at y’all

            cha u call them all hartless and u say sumthing like that? wut do that make u?

          • cha

            Devil go eat shit and die bastard. You probably do wish that he was your uncle, then yor life might have a purpose!!!

          • devil

            it’s okay laughin, don’t worry about me… you see the truth is, she could be sending a very hardline political statement, saying that i shouldn’t dish it out if i can’t take it. but see here’s the thing. it’s not that. she is just a total retard. i mean does anyone else notice how cha is sticking up for a child molester again? a tried, and convicted child rapist, who spent four and a half months in prison, before being shanked by an inmate. but i’m not surprised. and by the way, i can take it. so bring it on bitch. let the free speech fly. feels good doesn’t it?

          • cha

            @ laughing at y’all… that makes me amother that will defend my child tooth and nail against any stupid ass bastard that tells me, and I quote, ” Fuck your 4 year old daughter bitch”, as did Devil. So I wouldn’t care if his uncle stuck a can of soda up his ass at that point, his mother either, he’s a bitch

          • cha

            awh…. let’s get the violin out….. WUSSY!!!!

          • devil

            yes break out the violin, play youself a little tune, ohhh… my poor four year old bitch….. why…… did that twelve year old say shit….i….will protect my little kid….by pretending…..that i’m meaner then a kid. an instant classic !!!

          • cha

            Okay, so now you want to step back into a child’s place and cry that you are only 12. OH FUCKIN’ WELL punk. I am a typical “momma bear”. Should your under developed nuts one day produce enough to make a baby, you “might” understand. Then again maybe not since you refer to woman as “bitches” and “cunts” and “whore”…. all the names you apparently heard your dad call your mom

          • devil

            well guess what mama bernstien, you can’t scratch through a screen, so if you want to try to hurt me, you’re going to have to cut deeper then making fun of my parents. and what? do you expect me to talk to you like a lady? news flash bitch. i treat everybody with the respect they deserve. you don’t get any sympathy from me, just because you have vaginosis. to me, you are nothing more then a dripping tampon hanging from barbra streisand’s snatch. you got me. your opinions mean nothing.

          • cha

            oh yeah, now my feelings are really hurt cause the future Jeffrey Dahmer called me names…. Isn’t it past your bed time little boy????I actually feel sorry for your mother. She should call me so that I can give her some pointers on how to fuck your little ugly wussy ass up.

          • devil

            ohh shit how did you ever guess my true identity?all this time it was i jefferey dahmer from the present. talking through the guise of a young boy. you must be really upset that i don’t fit in with yourlittle psychiatric analisys that people who make michael jackson jokes are all hicks, drop outs, and retards. by the way. it’s like i said i treat my mom with the respect she deserves. in fact if my mom found out how you’ve been talking to her little boy, she would rip you a new hole to bleed out of. and fuck bedtime! what is this leave it to beaver?!

          • cha

            Hay Dahmer….fuck yo momma. she’s a whore!!!!

          • cha

            I crack myself up!!!

          • devil

            yyyeeesssss! keep it up my prescious… this is excellent we think, yesss!! keep this up and soon we will have converted her into one of usss!! your playing right into my hand. you’re sounding less and less sophisticated. your true colors are showing. your comments are becomming less whitty and impactful. you are finding humor in more tasteless jokes, and spewing them with such confidence. if i didn’t know any better i’d swear i was getting to you. sweetheart!

          • cha

            getting to me???? You couldn’t get in the freezer even if you had a step stool. And please, your Harry Potter comments are not bothering a single hair on my head. To be converted into one of you, what does that mean Dahmer??? Last time I checked, I only have steak and chicken in my freezer, not human ass and liver. LMFAO…ROFLMAO

          • devil

            yes thats right… i actually am jeffery dahmer, you believe that don’t you? say shouldn’t you be in bed right now? with your husband?? you have kids so you must be happily married right? so why aren’t you having angry sex with him right now? what did he go out for a pack of smokes? like ohh say 3 and a half years ago? you must be single. there’s no self respecting man out there who would let someone talk to his bride like this. what, did you drive him crazy? no wait, he slept with someone else right? was it your sister? no, you seem to have mommy issues….it must have been her right? man i bet she would go nice with some farva beans and a nice kiante. isn’t that right doll?

          • devil

            and i wouldn’t crawl into a freezer to thaw you out a weinie to go fuck yourself with

          • cha

            Daddy is at work ue home any minute now, and me my 2 oldest boys are sitting here laughing at you. the yonger ones are already asleep. That is what you call a family, a loving unit. My boys don’t use the language you do, so they think that you are pathetic. Now as for your beer guzzling daddy that beats your whore, I mean mommy every night, can’t compare to what I have. AND believe me, there is no need for a frozen weenie when I sleep next to a warm one. Are those the same weenies that Uncle stuck up your ass every night???

          • devil

            let me ask you a question, oh maiden fairest. why in heaven’s name are your children awake at such an ungodly hour.oh, how wonderful a mother thou must be. to allow thine offspring to gaze upon this language oh so foul. alas, be it at my expense, or at my will. i am happy to bringith prescious laughter to the children, who must be oh so tired. as this is in fact the very purpose of this website. and the prescious family moments that i have given you and your family oh so selflessly. a shame on my language which up until now have been so foul. a plague on me i say. a plague on me and my househould for the outrageous slings and arrows which i hath befallen upon thee. the language of a foul and mischevous boy, oh, the disgrace that i feel for having exposed the miracles that are your two, perfect, oldest boys, to such hurtful language….. fuck you! yeah same hotdogs, that’s why i kept them.

          • devil

            by the way they probably just love having someone finally stand up to their mother

          • devil

            any minute now???? thats what they all say! he aint coming back.

          • cha

            Sorry for the long delay, Daddy came home and put us all to bed. My boys, funny you should ask, but they are older than you fart face and will without a doubt beat the shit outta you, not the same way uncle did, but ya know!!! Not to mention, it is summer break, you would know that if you went to school dummy. So Jeffery, or is it Mr. Dahmer, go play in traffic

          • devil

            yes please send yuor boys after me, go ahead. and what? you think i didn’t know that it is summer vacation. i don’t know if you can tell with your little pea brain, but i’m actually pretty bright. probably even smarter then you. and if you didn’t notice, that takes an education. something you probably stopped getting in about grade 10. funny how your husband has to tell you when to go to bed. how stupid are you? “ohh i’m tired, it’s 430 am, what do i do?” you could send your fucking husband after me for all i care. i’ll impale his ass on a pole. (a trick i learned from my uncle.) you want me to play in traffic, okay.. we’ll play my favorite game, it’s called pretend i have a license and smoke your whole family. you call me a dummy? you’re the one losing an argument with a twelve year old.

          • cha

            aw….did i hurt your little feelings???? I wouldn’t waste my time sending my boys after you, and I hope you won’t send “yuor” mommy after me.LMBO!!!! and you say that “your” smarter “then” me???? HUMMMM I think you need to go to the library this summer so that “you’re” prepared for 3rd grade soilder. In case you haven’t noticed, I am smarter “THAN” you!!!!

            And by the way smart ass, I am in California, learn the time difference you bastard

          • cha

            Tell your mommy I said she should have let your uncle swallow you!!!

          • devil

            listen i don’t care if “you’re” in california or cougameloncamp. the fact is, no, you didn’t hurt me… i don’t even know what would give you that idea. but here’s the thing. i know that you are running out of intelligent (sounding) things to say. if you want to start nit-picking every little typo, then you are just avoiding the actual point. you were supposed to be protecting “your” daughter from the mean person who said “fuck her.” instead you waste both of our time. (so did i.) but the fact remains. i said fuck you and “your” four year old. that is my opinion; that you can both go fuck off. then you brought “your” sons into it. have a good laugh boys… “your” mom should take “your” sister and fuck off. it doesn’t matter what time zone “you’re” in, stupid is stupid. guess what, neither one of us will ever change the other’s opinion. so i don’t care if you think that “you’re” more of a contemplatist than i am. or you think that “your” intelligence is at a higher level than mine. the fact remains, that “you’re” a bitch. stubborn and dense. as simple as grass. you need to wake up! you have bigger things to worry about than my willingness to stand up for the right to say whatever i want. hear it and move on with “your” life. and by the by… i’d be willing to bet that “you’re” NOT smarter than i.

          • devil

            and i’m in washington. there is no time difference.

          • cha

            awwwww….. ur too cute!!!

            And fuck you too, tell your mom, dad, grandparents, and siblings dido, and much love to uncle. Give him a kiss and hug for me :o)

          • Devil’s Uncle

            Hay boy. Stop bothering this little lady and disrespecting her and her kids before I come out back and make you bend over the garbage can and have my way with your little pink asshole. Although it doesn’t hurt ya anymore, I will still do it the same way I did your mom and dad a second ago. Now you apologize and stop saying those awful names your daddy calls your momma.

            Same goes for you little lady. stop arguing with my retarded nephew. you’re gonna get him all mad and tense, then I will never be able to penetrate that little pink asshole of his. He wll be hollering like a fat pig and might shit all over me again.

          • jACk

            this was totally hillarious. you people are funny. It sounds like Cha is a Jacko lover, and Devil is a Jacko follower. Wonder who will get the short end of that stick? No pun intended Devil

          • Cha

            Thanks Uncle Devil ;o)

          • devil

            hey, oh my god… look, my uncle has come out of the woodworks now… good for you…buddy! i’ve missed you. you haven’t been paying support on our baby. you wouldn’t know her if you looked at her, but i could introduce you. you’ve been gone so long, i’m sure she’d love to meet you… so anyways i won’t hold you in suspense any longer.
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            .
            cha, this is your uncle daddy. apparently his name, (conveniently enough,) is Devil’s Uncle. and uncle devil’s uncle, this is our baby daughter, cha. seriously though, you’re cha’s mysterious husband right. the one she says is her “daddy”? wow that works ot nicely.
            and jack… no buddy, that’s just ignorant. you’re ignorant.ignorant yeah. that’s just ignorant…. ignorant….. !
            i don’t follow senior ding-dong. i just took angel/cha’s advice… i did my reserch before i openned my mouth.
            but other then that, i’m sure my uncle devil’s uncle, was trying to… uhh… upset me??
            i don’t know but nice try with the joke… don’t quit your day job. enjoy the recession arseholes.

          • Devil’s Uncle

            Hay there boy…don’t go sassin’ me. Do you know who I am? You know darn well I don’t have any kids, nor have ever been with a woman. I fucked your mother, but she is really a man. Don’t take your anger out on me just because you let Cha get the best of you. Keep talking to me like that and I won’t use any spit next time I ram my pink dick into your asshole, only the sweat from your balls.

          • devil

            hey jack, by the way, no worries man. I know it’s all fun and games brother. (damn, kind of ignorant of me to just assume that you wouldn’t mind me calling you brother.) anyways i’m glad you’re enjoying this. i am too…. a lot!! i mean do you see how pissed cha is getting? and hey listen, i’m sure that if she doesn’t grow up, there could be lots more. i might even start a web site, where we can just cuss each other out full time. now… watch this drive!

            and cha, yeah i’m not going to forget you. hey speaking of you growing up, don’t you find it funny, that i’m twelve, and you’re the one acting like a child. in fact let me lay it down for you, r.e.a.l.l.y. s.i.m.p.l.y. f.o.r. y.o.u. okay? this is the way it goes… i say something to make you miserable. then, you say something to make me miserable. it’s just a game. and i’m going to win. because i have an advantage. you see… you’re standing on the edge of a very steep, and very slippery hill. you are actually buying into what i’m saying to you. so with the right… little push, i could send you right over the edge. and if i did that, you would have a very unpleasent secon half of your life.it’s sad looking at how much time you have left, isn’t it. thinking back to wasted years. you may have even been pretty in high school. lord knows you didn’t use that time to develop a personality. you probably just got popularity from doing michael jackson’s dance steps. but now you’re a few years older… a few wrinkles(don’t worry, little surgery will clear that right up. if it’s good enough for m.j. it’s good enough for you.)and maybe you’ve let yourself go a little bit…. i know, it’s hard to stay in shape after popping out a few kids right? you don’t get the cat calls and comments that you used to maybe. anyways, there’s a thousand reasons why nobody likes you, but defending the one measly remaining piece of your once youthful glory, won’t bring your time back. so act your freaking age “mama bear.” you see you are what i like to call, hyper-sensitive.( i didn’t coin that phrase.) that’s why you love michael so much. and that’s why you fell for his line of bullshit when he claimed to be innocent. let me guess… you could just tell he was innocent. or, you could see it in his eyes. and you probably think that you’re…. just a little bit psychic, don’t you? that’s why you thought you were getting to me. isn’t it? but here’s the raw truth okay. i’ve been holding back on you. i’d say quit while you’re ahead… but ;) well you know it… you know it. just.. quit while you’re even on the radar behind me. save your dignity. if i spelled anything wrong. it’s just because i typed too fast, it is not indicident of my intelligence. just look passed it.

          • devil

            hey uncle devil’s uncle, you sound just like yosimite sam, now get lost you cotton picking varment. or i’ll have to take you behind the shed and turn the sword in the opposite direction, i got a lot tougher sinse the last time you fucked me. anyways just stay dead okay uncle devil’s uncle. by the way i don’t mean cotton picking varment in that way… just to be clear. it’s just one of yosimite sam’s only catch-phrase. as racist as it may be. if it pisses anyone off, write the warner bros. a letter.

          • Devil’s Uncle

            Alright you little bitch, that does it. I have had enoughof your mouth. bring your little pink asshole here so that I can do what I do best with it, and if you are a good boy and let me finish, you can lick up the mess!

          • cha

            that’s the funniest shit ever…. but no worries, this little asswipe that is pretending to be a 12 year old innocent little boy does not get under my skin. I have been called worse by better than him. This just gives me a good laugh. So he can continue to jack off to his beat it poster. I’m loving Devil’s Uncle though. You are simply hilarious

          • devil

            alright cha, i can see why you’d think i was pretending to be twelve. but sorry twelve year olds can be smart too. but what in the flaming hell makes you think i’m pretending to be innocent? by the way… you should relax your forehead while you type, you’re causing extra wrinkles.

            uncle devil’s uncle, funny…so let me ask you a question… in your state… can you be arrested for sexually harassing a minor? because if the fbi were to find that on your computer, i don’t think they’d see the humor like cha and i do. tone it down, i don’t need anyone else arrested and shanked because my uncle was an asshole. even though it wouldn’t break my heart. by the way… your yosimite sam impression is much funnier then your mary poppins,

          • cha

            yeap…I saw that comment coming. “I’m 12 and just very smart”. Personally i could give 2 fucks if you’re 12 or 50. The fact still remains that you are a bitch ass bastard that needs a reality check, especially if you claim to be a 12 year old innocent little boy. But you have bored me now, so have a nice life fuck face, you and your uncle, and fuck off

          • devil

            unfortunately, i’m not that easy to get rid of. although i know that when you say i’ve bored you, what you really mean to say is, i got to you. otherwise you wouldn’t have bothered writing the comment. and yes i know that you said there is nothing i can say that would get to you, or bother you. is that true? wow, so i guess that means you wouldn’t mind if i posted say… A FEW MICHAEL JACKSON JOKES!!!!!!

          • devil

            hey uncle devils uncle, looks like you picked the wrong side eh? your girlfriend doesn’t want your help anymore… she just wants ME to take YOU and fuck off. not the other way around.
            pow pow
            ‘, “yee haww!” ,’
            ‘see you ’round back ya no good varment.’

          • cha

            is that your ” I won, I won, I shot the b.b. gun…you lot, you lost, you ate the applesauce!” song. What in the heck did you win? You have not changed my mind one bit about anything, nor do you have me in tears the way that Devil’s Uncle and I have you. But if you still want to talk, then go ahead…..What’s up retard? Trying to think of some more lame ass jokes about me and my kids??? I got one… What’s hot, pink, and smell like shit? Your asshole after Uncle is done…LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

          • devil

            sorry cha, i’ve been away having a life. you should try it. but anyways, listen , because i did win. you may not admit it, and you may contest it. but i won. the whole point of this little spat, was to desensitize you to these jokes. now when you said that i can’t bother you with what i say. then i am free to say whatever i wish…. i won. straight up. even though it doesn’t matter to me, because i have a life outside the chatrooms. and while you were busy focused on me, these fine people were free to say whatever their hearts desired… i beat you. deal with it! …… peace!

          • Angel

            Guess who’s back Devil??? I had this on my mind for weeks and have been laughing my ass of about it. You claim to be so smart and intelligent as a 10 year old innocent molested youngster, why did you not figure out that me and Devil’s uncle were the same person????LMFAO…ROFLMAO!!!!! you are truly a dumb fuckk!!!!

          • Angel

            Just had to post one more laugh at Devil……:o)

            LMFAO….dummy

    • wiz

      singing plastic pedo

      and aint we all alive till wer forgoton

    • Rosalyn Burston

      all of you people need to stop fucking wit dat damn man, shit he dead now so let him rest in peace you musty motherfuckers

  • jonny

    Apparently when they found him he was blowing bubbles………
    The good news is the monkeys ok and is in a stable condition

    • tink_23

      wow,wat is with yall?????????????

  • xxxxxx

    Michael Jackson – Dead Man Moon-Walking

  • boo boo

    Good on you all…might aswell take the piss, why are people looking at dead MJ jokes and then getting upset????????

    • Cha

      yeah, perhaps we should start a Farrah Fawcett Jokes website and see the different color of piss we get

      • Jon

        That was stupid.

        • Cha

          much like you?????;o)

  • bouyed

    what is the difference between farrah fawcett and michael jackson–one did majors the other minors

    • GJM

      excellent!

    • ricky bobby

      thats good :D

    • tink_23

      who cares what the differince is dude just know that they both died,and its sad to hear.okay i loved MJ with all my heart i still wish he was here today…………..sorry for being so mean i just get so sad when die lol im so RANDOM.

      • hobo82

        Seriously, your still here… go away and take cha with you. Let him rest in john…I mean peace, and get off our nuts about it. Even you can admit that most of these jokes are freaking awesome. What I can’t believe is how any American is really willing to stand up for any homosexual who is a freakin pedophile. Aside from that I typed dead mike jokes and got here…
        How’d you get here?

  • aharon

    it is now believed that michael jacksons death was a hereditary disease. apparently it had something to do with the billy gene….

    • whatever

      ha ha
      corny but cute

    • kidvishis

      k that one i like

  • inquest

    alot of money at stake, 50 concerts, proved not guilty. how long until a film how long until the supposed victims speak out. suicide or murder. talented man abused as a child. A Historical figure who we would not be without. I think killed through too much presure who is responsible and is the recompense for the guilt he has carried.

  • dj dennis

    LMFAO… the MJ JOKES ARE FUNNY! Ive been sending out texts all day.

  • Angie McCormick

    Wow!!! People are sick. Always looking for the misfortune of others to make them feel better about their on insecurities.

    • bouyed

      ok–i just made these up–
      SINCE YOU SEEM TO LOVE IT SO MUCH

      Detectives yesterday when going through Michael Jackson’s hone discovered a Photo of Mj’s tongue up Macully Culkin ass? Apparently, Mj did for sh!ts and giggles

  • franksta

    k little boys hes dead please say he touched ur penis

  • Mr McLikit

    Actually I was told MJ never turned anything down…Except 12 year old boys, they went face down.

  • pazookie

    STORY BREAKING NEWS! Micheal Jaskson died yesterday from cardiac arrest. The officers later found out why.He was jacking off to a picture of a little boy, the maid walked in alittle later and told him she miss placed a picture of her little girl. His heart stopped and soon after that michael was pronounced dead. 6-25-09

    • whatever

      Wow… did you make that one up yourself? Can you get any more lame??

      • Jablome

        Ya –hanging out with you in your Studio Apt–fucking drone–quick question for you– do you Keep the shopping cart in the garage or just leave it at the stair case?

  • ricky bobby

    whats the same about michael jackson and xbox answer: there both plastic and kids turn them on

  • Dani

    So I heard the amber alerts have been resolved for all those missing children, apparently they’ve been found in michael jacksons basement

  • Jay

    This is great. Yeah he made great music but he definitely had a thing for little boys. Priests who do the same get crucified yet this asshole gets idolized. Making amazing jokes about the joke that was Michael Jackson is awesome. Lovin every minute of it.

  • jop

    I’m wondernig how it is all the people who are so offended at dead Michael Jackson jokes, and think its wrong eneded up on a site with dead Michael Jackson jokes. Maybe because they typed dead Michael Jackson jokes into google cause they wanted to hear some dead Michael Jackson jokes. Hypocrits.

    • Cha

      not at all…. why would someone type dead jokes… this bull crap came up after simply typing his name and trying to see what was going on with him. Only ignorant people as yourself would so something so stupid

      • bouyed

        speaking of wrong ended— I hear he will be burried face down so the kids have a place to park their bikes when visitng

  • scott jackson

    its all ok the plastic factory are going to make a new micheal jackson

  • Cha

    I do wish I had never visited this webiste. I thought I was opening up a site that had something intelligent to say, as well as intelligent readers…. I see by some of these post I was DEAD wrong….right???

    • jop

      Your first post was at 1:39 its now 2:50, yeah you been here over an hour or keep comming back cause you are sooooo offended.

      • Cha

        yeap because I love chatin’ it up with assholes like you

        • pledge allegiance to the flag…

          Quote – “I thought I was opening up a site that had something intelligent to say, as well as intelligent readers…”

          The Freakin’ Title Bar says “Dead Michael Jackson Jokes | CelebJihad.com…” !!!!!

          So, no – you weren’t.

    • GJM

      then fuck off

      • Cha

        can you show me how???

        • hobo82

          mike can… Oh wait no he can’t

    • bouyed

      that makes 2 of you

    • therealcindylynn

      Oh, how I wish you were simply dead just like michael jackson than you can both fuck each other in hell because we both know that’s what you really want. Oh.. wait sorry, you’re too old for him. :) Seriously though, to all you die hard Michael Jackson fans, why don’t you do us all a favor and off yourselves. What’s sicker? A child molester or his twisted fans. How about you kill yourselves like the others and all burn in hell together, I know you wouldn’t be worshiping the bitch if he touched your kid. Or maybe your sick asses would let him.

  • mike

    Did you hear Micheal Jackon and Elton John were working on a song toghether before Michael’s death. It’s called : Don’t let your son go down on me.

  • Sw0rDMaN

    Micheal is not dead he went back to his aliens pedo friends on the planet of pedolalilo :D

  • Ryan

    How do you know its bedtime at the Jackson house? When the big hand touches the little hand…

    • jimbo

      best so far LMAO!

      • lex

        lol way to funny

        • Papahodge

          Whats light brown….and in a babys diaper…. Micheal Jacksons hand….lol

        • cozzisthakingofkings

          wtf why would you think that that is your just dumb man

    • hobo82

      That’s making the text message bracket

  • Welcome to Hell

    Have fun in Hell you sick fuck!

  • Welcome to Hell

    MJ was a worthless piece of shit nigger faggot who couldn’t sing if her tried.

    • Cha

      Welcom to Hell just proved me right. What does “nigger” have to do with it???? Like I said, this is a website full of ignorant people!!!

      • Bella

        Then why are you still here??? You keep posting about how much you hate this website and wish you never came here cause its full of ignorant people. If thats how you feel, then leave.

        • Cha

          not untill every ignorant person, as yourself, knows for sure that you are truly IGNORANT!!!!!!

    • trixxter

      that’s a little too far
      i love the jokes, but you’re just an ignorant ass.

    • Tasha

      Okay…Im not a huge fan of Micheal Jackson….And as cruel and rude and disrespectful these jokes are…there is no reason in hell that you should be so cruel and ignorant to call him the N word….I dont think that it was very nessesary to take it that far….I mean most of you all seem to be getting off by reading these jokes….Maybe you all are GAY yourselves….Maybe ya’ll look up to him…and wanna be just like him….

      • lol

        ”Maybe you all are GAY yourselves”

        MJ was never gay.. ? he liked little girls to. :\

      • emo/punk rocker girl

        your right forget the past think of music!!!!!1

    • tiggypoo

      ok i like those other jokes but that went way to far! whos to say ur not a stupid shit nigger faggot and i bet u cant sing any better >:( u stupid ass

    • Joe

      Your a worthless peice of shit white trash faggot who can’t spell if you tried

      • jackmeoff

        You are both idiots. Your a worthless…. is supposed to be You’re…..so you are actually the dumb ass that can’t spell. The other idiot is stuck in texting spell mode. Get over it you stupid fucks.

  • SSG in Iraq

    This is some Awesome stuff…wish I had one to add! Thanks for the laughs! I bookmarked so as soon as I hear a good Dead Jackson Joke…I’ll be back to post!

  • rick james

    The funniest thing about Michael Jackson is that he made a confession song years before committing the crimes. LMAO who’s bad?

    • pledge allegiance to the flag…

      “You been touched by….a smooth criminal…” L O L

  • Tuna

    Michael Jackson molested children – the jokes are all in fun, unlike the seriousness of his life.

  • Tuna

    What did Michael Jackson like about 28 year olds?

    There were 20 of them.

    • blah

      you should have spelt it out it would have made more sense

  • mr.Plastic

    Gary Glitter was devastated to hear of Michael Jacksons death, but he wants first refusal on the kids.

  • wiz

    doctor to nurse: check michaels pulse! can you feel it? can you feel it? CAN YOU FEEL IT?
    doctors blame michael jacksons death on a cardiac arrest, others not sure wether to blame it on sunshine, the moonlight or just blame it on the boogie :)

  • rick james

    WOW lol i dont think i would have givin myself the name Welcome to Hell and then go as far to invite Michael Jackson inside of me lol

  • Tuna

    What’s the difference between a grocery bag and Michael Jackson?

    Ones made of plastic and dangerous for your kids to play with and the other is used to caryy your shopping items home in.

    • blah

      ahahahhaha thats great :)

  • mr.Plastic

    Urgent announcement – wanted good home for abandoned monkey, very friendly , likes being jerked of with a white glove.

    • whatever

      OMG i completely forgot about the glove thing LOL

    • hobo82

      lmfao

  • mr.Plastic

    Reports that MJ having a heart attack in hospital are incorrect. He was actually in the childrens ward having a stroke.

  • mr.Plastic

    I hear Madonnas looking for a new baby sitter.

  • kevin

    Q: Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a dead pedophile?
    A: Nothing

  • The end

    Michael Jackson was a child molester, anything that comes from/after his death is just due justice. All you people getting upset and defending him sicken me. But in the end judgment is god’s alone.

    • lex

      After all that has been publicly said about him molesting children i don’t know how anyone can defend him. I can’t even stand to listen to his songs.

    • Shana

      umm no… HE WAS FOUND INNOCENT BY A JURY OF HIS PEERS. SO SHUT UP AND GET A LIFE YOU LOSER. U SICKEN ME

      • John

        that jury doesn’t matter now. personally, i’m glad hes dead. my kids are safer now. ROT IN HELL MJ! if anyone out there is offended, sorry. but you must be reding this for a reason. if it wasn’t MJ jokes, you’d just get pissed about something else.

      • Jbone

        Totally an invalid point….OJ was also found innocent by a jury of his peers! Did you believe that one too?

      • Chuck

        Hey Turdboy, He settled out out court for millions. Goggle is your friend.

        • Jesus

          what is goggle? like for seeing under water?

      • Linda

        OJ was found innocent by a jury of his peer, too. Do you think he was innocent too? I think not. They both had the money to pay off alot of people.

      • BMC

        Correction, no jury. It never went to trial, he paid off the key witness (boy he molested). Charges were dropped. I believe that’s the way it went.

      • devil

        Yes…Thats true. However, the jury must have been rigged or retearted. You see, they needed to find 12 people who were unbiased. However… unbiased means that they don’t know who he is.
        Now, either, a: those people have truely never heard of micheal jackson. Which would mean that they haven’t even glanced at a magazine rack, or turned on a t.v. or radio in what? The last 40 some odd years that Michael has been famous, or b: they lied to get on the jury and defend him.
        I’ll bet every one of you fools defending him would have done the same. people like you are the exact reason michael never got punished for his crimes… in fact to go one step further… if he had gone to jail, do you think they would have given him access to whatever drug it was that killed him? and so, in effect, if he had gone to jail, he would probably still be alive.
        But wait doesn’t that mean that its almost like its your fault that he died? can everybody here follow that logic? And remember, I’m not saying that you are directly responsible for his death, and I am not unsympathetic for the fact that he died. All I’m saying is that prisons have detox centers.

        • Angel

          you act as if you were there holding a flash light. Who’s to say that the litle kids were not telling lies???? I supposed you haven’t heard the news that the first kid that made the very first complaint admitted that he lied, his father made him do it because they needed money. This came out days after Michael Jackson died. So stop being so quick to judge and learn your facts.

          • devil

            ohh. the great and powerful angel, tries to shoot me down again. let me ask you a question. When did i say whether or not he was guilty? look read it over and over bitch! all i said was that the jury wasn’t impartial. So put my dick in your mouth and stop talking shit. oh yeah, and you learn the facts bitch, nobody but those kids know the facts. try again whore.

          • cha

            Devil….you are truly a bitch ass jerk. I wouldn’t put you 2 inch dick anywhere near my mouth knowing that your uncle had it first!!! the whore that gave birth to you told me so :o)

          • devil

            okay cha, guess what, #1 my dick is 7 and a half inches, which correct me if i’m wrong… but that’s bigger than any dick that your fat ass has ever taken in.#2 my uncle din’t have it first, your mother did. and then that whore gave birth to you. that’s right… cha…. i am your father. plus you’re comments are lame. notice how when i post a comment. i back it up with facts. and when you post a comment it is made up off the top of your head. so who’s the ignorant one? not me.

  • Michael Jackson

    When the paramedics attempted to perform CPR, they tilted Michael Jackson’s head back and pinched his nose but it fell off. They decided they would close his mouth and blow through the hole in his face instead, but his lips were too thin to get a good enough seal. He died.

  • jimbo

    MJ’s family have expressed their desire to have his body cremated and for his ashes to be inserted inside an Etcha-Sketch. They feel it is only fitting for the kids to have the final fiddle!

  • JasonB

    Autopsy results show he died of Food poisoning: he was found with 13 yr old nuts in his mouth

  • karyn

    i agree…people are just heartless!

    • devil

      yeah… heartless… like the people who molest children. but sorry lady, I’m willing to bet that each of these people, do in fact have a heart.

      • Angel

        and they also have parents that make them lie!!!

        • devil

          kids fucking love to lie!!! I’ll tell you a lie right now, i think your a wonderful person, probably very beautiful, and a wonderful mother. let me ask you another question. how much money would it take for you to scar your child for life? would you teach your child about the intricacies of molestation to make a few bucks? hmmm. wasn’t one of the children able to describe the details of michael’s penis? i don’t think that his parents told him to say that.

          • cha

            Money talks, epecially when you don’t have it. And what the fuck…. how hard is it to describe a penis, especially when you have one. What are the specific detailsof his penis that makes it different from others??? Size???Shape???Smell???? Please let me know

          • devil

            well, clearly being you…. you wouldn’t know the first thing about cocks. here’s a few little details you left out okay. 1. was he circumsised? 2. length/width. 3. hardness 4.micheal jackson disease, did it have brown spots? 5. micheals fashion sense, did it have glitter on it. 6. before he touched you with it did he put on a little white condom with rhinestones. 7. pubic hair, lon or short? was it dyed? was it styled to look like mickey mouse? these are all things that someone could say to describe a penis. now you know, maybe you could show the penis a little respect, you fucking dyke bitch.

  • mr.Plastic

    Its just been reported that MJ will be buried in a childs coffin.Reports that he wouldn’t fit have been dismissed as he has had plenty of practice squeezing himself into little boys boxes over the years.

  • Wako Jacko

    Apparently Michael Jackson isn’t gonna be buried or cremated… He’s gonna be turned into White Plastic Bags. This way he can still be White, Plastic and a Danger for kids to play with!

    • We find it hilarious

      This one is absolutly fantastically funny. Of course, I’m sitting hear reading these, laughing my ass off, listening to old Michael Jackson songs.

    • Cancer baby

      LMFAO HAHAHAHAHA that was awesome!!!!

      • kevin butler

        these jokes are not funny.he just died.i bet u all didn’t do this shit to elvis when he died.u all should be ashamed of your self.especially u.just put it this way if u died and every thing,how about we make jokes of u,u won’t think it is so funny then would u ,u are a son of bitch.people like u should be in trouble.i just read just one of the jokes and i didn’t think that was right to make fun of him.so stop writing jokes about michael u freak

        • anonymous

          Well, mj is dead so it does not matter what anyone says, he will not see it. He was a child rapist and lived much longer then he should have. If there is a heaven and hell, you know he’s getting a pineapple shoved up his arse right now and yelling “HE HE HE”

          The only way to honor mj is going out and molesting a bunch of young boys.

        • Blowing Bubbles

          I think jokes made at my expense are funny now. Fortunately, I have enough self-esteem not to take myself too seriously.

        • hobo82

          So Kevin butler, you want a law to be set in place to govern what we can say or not say? Was I reading that right? Your a fuckin democrat arn’t you? Your butt buddy is in hell, deal with it.

        • bouyed

          move to FKG IRAN THEN

          • Dead Ed

            I would absolutely KILL if you libs took any of our rights away. Especially the 1st & 2nd ammendments. They must’ve meant a lot to the Founding Fathers, as they do to me, for them to start with those 2 ammendments when they started ammending the law.

        • Howard

          ELVIS is not DEAD!! Get over it!!

        • LoneStar

          I did exactly the same thing…I got on the internet & typed Dead Elvis jokes! Who could forget my classic “What would Elvis be doing now if he was alive? Scratching on his coffin lid!”? Unfortunately it was 1977 and no one else was online!
          You are an idiot if you think Dead Michael jokes aren’t funny! You are a celebrity-worshipping jackass if you are not getting a few laughs out of Jacko’s demise! He was a sick freak that believed money gave him the right to misbehave any way he desired. Michael was a child molester who could sing & dance – not much more. He was so odd that he was routinely the material comedians loved! Much of his life was a joke, so why stop laughing at him now? Michael is lucky his punishment turned out to be dead at 50 with the world making jokes about his passing. It should have been being beaten to death in prison after getting turned around and bent over by every horny inmate in the California penal system!
          And I can’t go without adding – Michael got picked up in California by the Grim Reaper last Thursday and the GR had the same problem so many others have had – he couldn’t get Michael’s nose to stay on. After trying unsuccessfully paste, tape, hot glue, acetate, & even his own spit, the GR was frustated and ready to give up. Finally, he asked Michael how he got his nose to adhere to his face and Michael replied “weeop davoo Monster Putty weee oooo shamone.” So the GR asked Michael if he knew where Billy Mays lived.

          • lolol

            um

          • Rick Jamesbitch

            Why dont you tell you’re whole life story while we’re at it ?Jeeez mr. not funny cuz you wrote too fucking mutch.

        • JEF

          Michael Jackson was not Elvis. To even compare the two is laughable, though i would be lying if i said that i have not seen the two compared over the last few days. Im really confused as to how these two events are related. they were completely different people. People made fun of MJ 20 years before he died and they will probably make fun of him 20 years after he died.

          And really the only elvis jokes you can make are about pill popping or fat jokes. As far as celebrities go thats pretty mild.

          • Tdawg

            When Michael died, he went to Heaven and found Elvis. He introduced himself and said “I’m the man that married your daughter.” Elvis replied “THANK GOD! I heard she married a black guy!”

        • ih8mj

          nobody did it when elvis died cause there was no internet . elvis was a great musician , but a drug infested waste of space .but unlike the king of pop(poping little boy cherries) The real KING didnt fuck little boys .
          What do caviar and MJ have in common……..they both cum on little crackers

        • phree

          what does Farrah Fawcett, Ed McMahon, and yourself have in common?

          give up?

          They all have no lives.

          • phree

            hahah, i forgot to include Michael “The king of pop”ping little boys Jackson in there, i apologize for my forgetfulness, but either way, im glad the man is dead, the world is a safer place for it, and the only charity hes contributed to lately is the wallets of parents who’s kids he molested, so fuck him and let him burn in hell, although satans gonna be pissed when he finds out he was molded out of non-flammable materials

        • Jablome

          I don’t remember the Internet functioning in 1976 you fucking idiot . Elvis? are you fucking kidding? Now there was a true King………of beers

        • devil

          okay dig this… kevin butler and his son walk into neverland ranch, and kevin says to michael, “hey michael, i wonder if you’d mind watching my son for the night.”
          Michael says, “sure I’d love to watch your son.”
          “Great!” says kevin butler. “thanks. i really appreciate that. I’ll be around in the morning to bring him back home.”
          on his way home tkevin butler feels a pain deep, deep in his asshole. so he turns the car around and goes to pick up his son.
          he arrives to find his son, and michael in bed together. “oh my god!! leave my son alone!!!” kevin butler screamed. You should be fucking me in the ass instead, I defended you on some website!”
          there you go kevin butler. now its about you instead. feel free to exercise your freedom of speech. i encourage it. but remember we can write whatever we want too!!!
          you freak!

          • Dead Ed

            HAHAHAHA!! Good one, devil…