In a new interview with Radar Online, Nadya “Octomom” Suleman admits, “I kind of have a crush on Jon Gosselin. I think he’s hot!”

Of course Jon Gosselin’s sex appeal is undeniable. What woman could resist a pudgy middle-aged Asian guy with hair plugs who wears Ed Hardy all the time? However, I just can’t help but think that Octomom’s attraction for Jon Gosselin runs deeper than just the physical.

These two seem to be made for each other. They both love using fertility drugs to have unholy amounts of children at one time. They both like abandoning those children to pursue a career as a D-list celebrity. And they both have huge vaginas.

Jon and Nadya Plus 22 here we come.

Like most Americans, I bust my ass day in and day out to collect a disability check. But it seems like every month a higher portion of my hard-earned money is going toward my cable bill. Why?

I’ll tell you why! It’s because of all these unemployed, white single mothers. Rather than get a useful TV job like “weather girl” or “softcore starlet,” these women just sit around and have a bunch of babies so they can live off handouts from the cable companies.

It makes me sick, but how can I blame them? Why should they work when they know those bleeding-heart TV executives and their mindless liberal policies have incentivized irresponsible behavior? The more kids these white women have, the bigger the handout.

Kate Gosselin: White! No job! No husband! Just 8 kids and bunch of stuff we paid for!

Octomom: White (whiter than I am, anyway)! No job! No man! 14 friggen kids from multiple fathers. When I see her driving around in her fancy SUV showing off her expensive lip injections it makes me sick!

Michelle Duggar: White! No job! At least she has a husband and teaches her 18 kids important things like right from wrong and how dinosaurs never existed. But answer me this; who is paying for all those fancy ankle-length denim dresses and her trendy bird’s nest hairdo! We are, that’s who!

I hate to paint all white women with the same brush, but stereotypes exist for a reason. I didn’t immigrate to this country and blow my legs off just so a bunch of lazy white parasites could jack up my cable bill.

Contact your congressman today and tell him to do something about all these white, unemployed single mothers.

“Octomom” Nadya Suleman and her 14 children have agreed to film a reality-TV show, and CelebJihad has obtained a leaked list of possible show titles. What’s your favorite?
 

• Whole Bunch’a Bastards
• Just the Ten of Us…Without the Birth Defects
• Nadya Suleman’s Postpartum Pool Party
• The “Maybe Pat Buchanan Was Right About That Whole Culture War Thing” Show
• Hotdog Hallway
• Welfare St-Eight
• America’s Next Top Child Star…to Overdose on Speedballs Outside the Viper Room
• Survivor: Infanticide Island
• Kids Say the Darndest Things…to the Department of Children and Family Services
• Whore Knows Best
• Everybody Hates Nadia
• Are You Smarter Than a Third-Grade Educated, Attention Starved, System-Draining, Two-Bit Whore?
• King of Queefs
• Roseanne
• Eight is Enough…to Make My Vagina Look Like a Gym Bag Full of Elephant Trunks

Have a better title? Register, and leave it in the comment section. The best title will win a CelebJihad t-shirt. The winner will be announced on Monday, August 3rd.

The Associated Press is reporting that “Octomom” Nadya Suleman has arranged for her 14 children to star in a new reality television show.

While details remain unconfirmed, rumor has it that the show will be a spin-off of the popular series Temptation Island, and will co-star America’s favorite pedophile, John Mark Karr.

Karr, who won America’s hearts after his famous JonBenét Ramsey murder prank, will host the show which will be filmed on an undisclosed island off the coast of Thailand, outside the jurisdiction of any pesky American laws.

Sources say Suleman’s older children as well as the octuplets, who should be able to walk by the start of production, will compete for Karr’s attention though a series of physical challenges and fashion shows. Each child will also be given one-on-one time with Karr so he can get a better sense of their individual personalities.

At the end of each episode, Carr will distribute a limited number of candy bars to the children he wishes to remain on the Island. This will continue until the final episode, in which the remaining three children will square off for the final spot.

Suleman’s children will reportedly earn $250 per day over three years, which will total approximately $250,000.

Karr’s is seeking a comeback after his previous game show, Are You Hotter than a 5th Grader, was killed in pre-production, and will be working pro bono.

Possible Show Titles

• Babies You Can Drive My Karr
• Get Out of My Dreams, Get into Mark Karr
• Eight (-Years Old) is Enough
  
• John Mark Karr diddles the Octomom’s kids on TV