Britney Spears doesn’t look bad in this bikini, per se, but something just doesn’t seem right. It’s like seeing a woman in a business meeting or reading a book, it just feels off.
While she has outgrown the “fat crazy Britney”, she hasn’t gone back to “sexy Britney.” Much of this might be in the eye of the beholder, as once you’ve seen bald, fat Britney hitting a car with an umbrella, it’s tricky to go back to seeing her in that schoolgirl outfit.
Someone should probably tell her that it’s time to hit the plastic surgery circuit and see what’s out there. I speak for America when I say that I’m sick of not lusting over Britney, and I think a lot of creepy old men will agree with me here. Get her under the knife, make her look like she did in 1999, but with bigger breasts, and she’ll be back and ready for prime time.
Until then, we’ll be subjected to pics like the above, with tiny muffin tops, and musings about what might have been.
When talking about disturbing depraved Western women one name is usually first to pop into mind, Britney Spears.
For years now Britney Spears has been prostituting her body all in the name of the Zionist controlled music industry. Unfortunately this she-demon also spawned a few offspring thanks to the help of dim-witted wigger.
In civilized countries like Yemen and Syria whores like Britney Spears are not allowed to raise children, it distracts them for their duties servicing powerful Muslim Sheiks. The children of these prostitutes are humanly put down by tossing them in the nearest river. However, in American society the government does nothing to dissuade whores from raising babies and thus polluting the population with their whore genes.
Well now Britney Spears has shown once again that she is an unfit mother. Look at her shacking her ass while “performing” in the GIF below.
Do you know how mentally messed her children will be when they are old enough to realize mommy does this sort of thing for money? I wouldn’t be at all surprised if there is a large collection of dead hookers in their future.
Just look at the promiscuous whore, Britney Spears, showing off her spine for the whole world to see. Last I checked, Britney had two children, yet here she sits, brandishing her back like some filthy Kurdish kum dumpster, as if to say “your arms are not powerful enough to hit me with a stone, righteous sons of Islam. Do your worst!”
What’s even more insulting is the poor quality of her spine. Years of hauling baskets of wool and figs to the bazaar have taken their toll, yet she continues to show off her physique like she still has the spine of a 13-year-old boy! Trust me, Britney. I know 13-year-old boys, I am a friend to 13-year-old boys. You ma’am, are no 13-year old boy.
By Muhammad’s beard! Britney Spears has just admitted to worshiping Satan! Brit said the following on her Twitter account,
We here at Celeb Jihad have worked tirelessly to warn the masses that all celebrities are Satan worshiping shape shifting reptiles, hell-bent on world domination. Now the truth comes out!
Britney was not done there though, she hit us one more time with this doozy of a twat,
“I hope that the new world order will arrive as soon as possible! – Britney”
With Barack Obama being the first celebrity President (I don’t count Ronald Reagan because his movies sucked), I’m afraid this world is doomed.
The righteous among us must build rocket ships and blast off into space, trusting that Allah will guide us to a more hospitable planet with no celebrities… or Jews.
Britney Spears’ left nipple has been stolen, CelebJihad can confirm. Apparently, Britney woke up this morning to find that her living-room window had been tampered with, but since nothing appeared to be missing, she went about her daily routine.
Several hours passed before the small Guatemalan boy in charge of removing unwanted hairs from Britney’s breasts made the shocking discovery and let out an audible cry of, “Aye, aye, aye, el pezon no mi gusto!”
Britney seems distraught over the theft, and is desperate to track down the culprit. But who would want to steal a nipple? Perhaps Tara Reid? Coco, the nipple loving chimp? Or perhaps her ex-husband K-Fed. After all, he has been working on some nice knockers of his own. A lady nipple could come in quite handy for him.
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K-Fat is back.
How fat is Kevin Federline (a.k.a. K-Fed, a.k.a. Well-Fed, a.k.a. K-Fat)?
He’s so damn fat that I had to post this picture horizontally in order to fit it on your damn screen.
If most normal human beings got this fat they would stay out of the public eye whenever possible and go on a diet. But Keven Federline isn’t a normal human being. He’s Britney Spears ex-wife. Obliviously he has no dignity.
As a result, K-Fat has decided to join VH1′s Celebrity Fit Club so that millions of unemployed and undereducated VH1 viewers can laugh at his fat ass.
Kudos to you, K-Fed.
It’s been reported that Kevin Federline is getting $5,000 a week from Britney to bring her kids on tour with her. He’s also the newest pseudo-celebrity to get his own reality TV show, which is undoubtedly a well-paying gig too (though producers were upset to find out the name “The Biggest Loser” was already in use). Based on these pictures, I’m gonna go ahead and suggest that a good chunk of those paychecks are going to the good people at Entenmann’s.
K. Fed’s supposedly gained 85 pounds since his 2006 divorce to Britney. He used to weigh in at just 150 but the National Enquirer claims he now weights 235. He’s so big that Britney’s now insisted that “he go on a diet and stop showing their kids it’s OK to be fat and sloppy.” She’s nicknamed him Kevin Fatterline and teases him, asking, “When’s the baby due?” and calling him “a fat housewife.”
