One of Oprah’s favorite books has turned out to be a fraud (again). What are some of the major inaccuracies in Herman Rosenblat’s now discredited Holocaust-era romance, Angel at the Fence?
10. The no-holds-barred football game between the prison guards and a rag-tag group of inmates.
9. Rosenblat’s jive-talking African-American sidekick, Detroit Jones.
8. The insistence that his future wife sustained him by tossing only delicious Mott’s brand Apple-Cinnamon Fun Packs over the fence.
7. Rosenblat’s claim that he did Hitler’s taxes in exchange for a new prison library and some beer for his fellow inmates.
6. The constant misspelling of the word “Hon-ik-a.”
5. Rosenblat’s repeated boasting that he “shtupped” a young Elizabeth Taylor after the camp’s annual Springtime Ball.
4. The fact Angel at the Fence is actually a reference to Rosenblat’s reported visions of Androstene-fueled spirits roaming the outfield of the Tel Aviv Angels of Anaheim baseball stadium.
3. The constant depiction of Rosenblat as a Christ figure; particularly during the scene where, on a dare, he eats fifty pieces of bacon.
2. Rosenblat’s claim that while in the camp he was bunkmates with hall-of-fame pitcher Sandy Koufax.
1. The climactic scene where Roseblat and his wife escape death by keeping their eyes firmly shut as the camp commandant opens the Arc of the Covenant.
The following write-up was submitted by one of our pre-teen female readers, one “Ashy94″.
O-M-G you guys!!! Robert Pattinson has cut his beautiful wavy hair. Sure I’d still let him violently penetrate my every orifice… and let him and his dreamy vampire friends gangbang me in a porn shop bathroom… and possibly let them defecate on me while they took turns kicking me in the ribs… but I’m going to miss those sexy curls!
I can only hope he kept some tousled locks around his balls and taint, so I can nuzzle my face in them while we talk about beautiful things like love, romance, and poetry *sigh*
P.S. My brother said that Robert Pattinson really is a vampire. But he is a special vampire that only sucks cum from his boyfriend’s asshole. I beat him with a sack of oranges and made him drink his own pee. LOL TTYL
Jennifer Hudson, still suffering from the murders of her mother, brother and nephew, expressed gratitude Thursday for her four sympathy Grammy nominations.
“It’s been a childhood dream of mine to release an album,” she said in a statement. Not many people even knew Jennifer’s dream came true, as the album has only sold 37 copies and not one single has had any airplay on an FM station.
“To receive four Grammy nominations is truly a blessing. I’m extremely honored and humbled.” She continued. “Now who has to die for me to actually win one of those suckers.” She later quipped.
To receive maximum publicity for the nominations they were announced on the same day her estranged brother-in-law, William Balfour, was ordered held without bail in the Chicago shooting deaths of Hudson’s mother, brother, and his own stepson. Senior public relations director for the Grammy’s Doug Goodstein called the timing of the nominations “kismet baby!”
